***Another Way To Seek A Newer World-For Brother Ronald Callahan Who Has Done Good In This World  

From The Pen Of Frank Jackman

A few years ago I had an occasion to write a short piece honoring the work of a fellow classmate from the North Adamsville High School (Massachusetts ) Class of 1964, Brother Ronald Callahan, who had as my old Irish grandmother would say, say looking at me directly, “the calling.” This classmate had devoted himself in his chosen way to “do good” in the world as a Catholic Xaverian brother. Doing good by ministering to the sick, the needy, those who have no other recourse, those who found themselves for whatever reason behind jail bars, and the “olvidados,” the lost and forgotten of the earth.

This year as we celebrate our 50^th anniversary of graduation from old North the class reunion committee has created a website to facilitate communications and round us up for probably one last time collectively. I, after a little editing, placed that piece on the Message Forum page for all his fellow classmates who have joined the site to see. I also hoped for a response in his own words and he graced those pages with a very interesting reply about the work he had done over the years. He also sent me a private e-mail (which he said was okay to make public, although I am only making my responses public) discussing a very different subject-our growing up poor in the old working class. Those remarks follows the sketch:   

 

For Oratorian Brother Ronald Callahan- North Adamsville High School Class of 1964- Another Way To Seek A Newer World

 

Frank Jackman , Class of 1964, comment:

Usually when I have had an occasion to use the word “brother” it is to ask for something like –“Say brother, can you spare a dime?” And have cursed, under my breathe of course, when I have not received recognition of and, more importantly, dough for my down and out status which required the use of that statement. Or I have used it as a solidarity word when I have addressed one of the male members of the eight million political causes that I have worked on in my life-“Brother Jones has made very good point. We should, of course, storm heaven to get this government to stop this damn war (fill in whatever war is going on at the time and you will not be far off).” Here, in speaking of one of my fellow North Adamsville High School classmates, Brother Ronald Callahan, I am using the term as a sincere honorific. For those of you who do not know Brother Ronald is a member of the Oratorian Brothers, a Catholic order somewhere down on the hierarchical ladder of the Roman Catholic Church. Wherever that rung is, he, as my devout Irish Catholic grandmother, the one who lived over on Young Street and was regarded by one and all as a “saint” (if only for having put up with a cranky, I am being kind here, grandfather), would say (secretly hoping, hoping against hope, that it would apply to me), had the “calling” to serve the Church.

Now Brother Ronald and I, except for a few sporadic e-mails over the last couple of years, have neither seen nor heard from each other since our school days. So this is something of an unsolicited testimonial on my part (although my intention is to draw him out into the public spotlight to write about his life and work of which I have a glimmer of long time ago recognition). Moreover, except for a shared youthful adherence to the Roman Catholic Church which I long ago placed on the back burner of my life there are no religious connections that bind us together now. At one time, I swear, that I did delight in arguing, through the dark North Adamsville beach night, about the actual number of angels that could dance on the head of a needle, and the like, but that is long past. I do not want to comment on such matters, in any case, but rather on the fact of Brother Ronald’s doing good in this world.

We, from an early age, are told, no, ordered by parents, preachers, and Sunday school teachers that while we are about the business of ‘making and doing’ in the world to do good, or at least to do no evil. Most of us got that ‘making and doing’ part, and have paid stumbling, fumbling, mumbling lip service to the last part. Brother Ronald, as his profession, and as a profession of his faith, and that is important here, choose a different path. Maybe not my path, and maybe not yours, but certainly in Brother Ronald’s case, as old Abe Lincoln said, the “better angels of our nature” prevailed over the grimy struggle for this world’s good. Most times I have to fidget around to find the right endings to my commentaries, but not on this one. You did good, real good, Brother. And from the ragtag remnant of the Salducci’s Pizza Parlor corner boys in the old North Adamsville hang-out good night- All honor to Brother Ronald Callahan.

 *******

“Brother Ronald –thanks for note- I loved that the movie (and book), The Friends of Eddie Coyle, with Robert Mitchum and based on George V. Higgins novel (and probably based on the now captured Whitey Bulger’s life or one of his crowd, or close to it) although I did not know the movie had scenes filmed in North Adamsville. I do remember Dorchester, Boston Garden, and downtown Boston scenes.

Funny that your area of town was called the “poverty pit” [part of the film was shot in his old neighborhood and his father, maybe rightly, had been upset that the film company had called the area that name] because I grew up in a shack of a house (with my two brothers, one who dropped out and should have been in our Class of 1964 and the other was Class of 1966) on Maple Street near Donegan Brothers Garage on Fillmore Street and people called that area “the wrong side of the tracks” too (including my grandparents who were born and raised on Sagamore Street-but that is another story).

All I know was that it was a tough dollar growing up poor, with hand-me-downs and big wanting habits that never got satisfied, when a lot of our classmates were a step above I think (although recent trips back make me thing that was just a relative thing). I carry that mark of po’ boy with me (as you do) but I have not forgotten, unlike others who moved up in the world, my roots and on the questions of war and peace, social and economic justice I know I have stood on the “right side of the angels.” As you have, my brother Brother.  Later- Frank-and don’t forgot those Ms. Sonos memories when you get a change [our senior year English teacher.”        

A Story Out In The 50^th Anniversary High School Class Of 1964 Sweethearts Night

 

From The Pen Of Frank Jackman 

A while back, maybe in early 2104, I wrote a little sketch for those in my North Adamsville (Massachusetts) High School Class of 1964 who had met in high school (or in a couple of cases earlier, in junior high if you could believe that in those hormonally-driven days when we could hardly think straight never mind think forever thoughts) and remained sweethearts, through thick and thin, for the past fifty years. Our class, or the reunion committee of our class, had recently put up a class website and so I placed that sketch on the Message Forum section there as a heartfelt tribute for all to see.

I tried to honor those fifteen couples with that tribute to their steadfastness, and love, for all that time noting that my own marital status, three marriages, a fistful of affairs, and more than a few flings had ebbed and flowed like the tides and that even a recent affair that I really tried, by my lights, to make work had faded out without a flicker after a short while making me finally realize that I am not a forever man. But my romantic troubles are not what I am concerned with today. As part of that class sweethearts sketch at the end I placed a “challenge” to any of those couples which read like this: 

 

“Well I have done my part. I have written a tribute to the Class of 1964 sweethearts that are celebrating 50 years together here. So the ball is in your court. Now you have tell us all about how you met (your version anyway), or anything else you would like including those bumps in the road during your time together if you like. We have all been there so just write away. Later Frank Jackman”           

 

As such things go, and given that we were of a generation that was on the edge of the technology revolution as well as the vagaries of, ah, old age, I did not necessarily expect any response to what is essentially a private matter. But a few weeks later Jeff Turner wrote a little something using the points raised in my sketch as talking points. He, and his lovely bride Kate (nee Kelly), had been one of the couples that I mentioned that met in junior high school (North Adamsville Junior High) and so he wanted to say that he appreciated some of my remarks, and differed on others. But the big point that he wanted to make was that he was a “forever guy,” a forever guy even back then although he sympathized with my “plight,” my marital ebbs and flows. So here is what he wrote:         

Frank-Thanks for the nice piece that you wrote about some of your old fellow classmates who have stayed together since high school. Kate appreciated it as well (and my comments here reflect a little her own thoughts but mostly this is my slant). It seems funny to be talking now about how long we have been together since really the time went by very easily. I never could figure out, no disrespect to you or other classmates, why more guys didn’t find their fate mates early for it may have saved them a lot of heartache. I agree with you that those teen times, especially in junior high (funny how they changed it and now call it middle school as I thought junior high sounded more grown up like you were almost an adult) when you said those years were something unbelievable with all the teen distractions and anxieties.

That is why when I grabbed onto Kate in eight grade and we got along, found we liked each other I was ready to plan a future with her (liked and grabbed each other by the way partially because both of our home lives were so bad, her father a drunk, and mine skirt- crazy and gone before I was ten). We did survive those awful trials (mainly our mothers trying to break us up because we were “too young” to be serious, thinking we should see other people before committing to one person, etc., etc.), tribulations (me never having dough and worrying that some guy with a few bucks or a line would sweep her away), traumas (both of high school romance, high school Saturday nights down at the beach or up at the quarries, high school anxieties over the prom, graduation, and just how to survive in the world) which in comparison made us staying together for fifty years easy.

Funny about how you said a lot of guys, seventy-six other guys I think it was, hitting on Kate because I know that was true, maybe not seventy-six but a lot of guys were always around her in the cafeteria so I would go cruising in and sit right down beside her, even in junior high, and that tended to stop some guys, for a while. If I recall your best friend in junior high, Frankie Riley, tried to hit on her with his beatnik line of patter and his arcane knowledge of a million odd-ball facts but she was wise to him from the beginning. First of all she was wise to his so-called knowledge, probably knew more that he did and corrected his factual mistakes for him. But more important and this is where Frankie made his fatal error, all big king of the hill corner boy over you guys at Doc’s Drugstore up the Downs or not, Kate was best friends with Frankie’s girlfriend then, Janice Murphy, and so she duly reported his transgression to her as quickly as she could get on the telephone and he caught hell from her. If it had been me who found out though Frankie and I would have mixed it up, no doubt about it. So you can see why I grabbed onto such a smart girl early and held on for dear life.

By the way Kate says that you tried to hit on her in high school, well not hit on her maybe but you used to give some meaningful glances in her direction in class and in the corridors from what she said. Or from what Kathy Craven told her a couple of times when Kathy noticed that after you passed Kate you would turn around to see if she turned around. All is forgiven now though although you know I would have been swooping down on you if you did more that some foolish glances. Frank, what I can’t figure out is how you thought some sideways glances were going to get you anywhere with any girl then. You know you had to actually talk to them. That’s what I did with Kate after I stopped getting moony-eyed over her and realized that she was taking her peeks at me in class too. I don’t know if this information would help you now but I thought I would mention it just in case.     

I don’t know exactly what attracted me to Kate at first, those times when she disturbed my sleep before I talked to her. Or what attracted other guys to her, guys like you if Kate is right about that glance stuff. It wasn’t because she was beautiful although she was (and is) but she had (and has) such a pleasing personality, winsome smile and was (and is) smart as a whip that I think guys figured if they rode her star then she would do their homework for them or something. And in the course of that some spark would jump out, I really don’t know.

Funny, going the other way, Kate told me once in high school when I asked her if she thought a girl in our class was looking at me, you know, with the look, never thought that other girls would be bothering me.  Although one time later Kate said if they had they might have seen a very different personality that what they were used to in the class “Miss Personality” but mainly she would say when I mentioned some girl and I said a kind word about her and that maybe she was “hitting” on me (although we didn’t use that word then but something else that I can’t remember but the grandkids use it all the time and it sounds right) she would say “yeah, you wish.”

The worst thing though Kate said when we talked one night last week, after reading your piece on the website about class sweethearts,  about how we met and the stuff we went through was, you know, Sally Smith telling a tale to her about how she saw me looking twice at a certain girl in Math class. Sally was always doing that although she was going steady with Tim Conroy, the football player and expressed no interest, none as far as I know, in me. That night I am talking about I made her laugh when I remembered Ben one time telling me who Kate was seen in the school cafeteria, Jesus, the cafeteria, talking to over lunch. That is when I would do my thing and get there and sit right beside her doing my protective bit. We both got a kick out of that personal stuff you mentioned, you know the stuff like what to do about those grabby hands of my part, Kate had my number on that although more than once we almost split when I didn’t want to take “no” for an answer. Especially when she was teasing me too far just too far in the days when her hormones were jumping out of her skin.

Jesus what we didn’t know about sex then, how to do stuff without getting into trouble, how and when not to do stuff, you know. We were both brought up to be Catholics and nobody, nobody even came close to giving us any information about what was going on. Kids today know by about ten what we didn’t know until we were married. I don’t know about you, although I remember seeing you and Frankie sneaking into the side chapel for Sunday Mass since that was where I was sitting too so I didn’t have to sit with my mother and two sisters in the main section, but I learned everything I knew about sex out in the streets from guys who said they knew stuff. I am glad I didn’t listen to half of their spiel because it was flat-out wrong although one thing that Kate and I used to do down at Adamsville Beach proved to be exactly right. Like you said we survived the tough parts of high school. 

To answer your question even though you really did not put it as a question who knows when or where it started for others. I know for me it was that first fresh-eyed glance in Mr. Forrester’s dreary English classroom looking at Kate until my eyes got sore. Kate said for her it was spying me while waiting, endlessly waiting, for the always late bus when I would be walking down the street after track practice (you remember Mr. Lewis the gym teacher who used to be the junior high track coach I think) and she went weak-kneed. (I swear that is what Kate said back then after we were “going steady” and she said that was what she said when we talked it over last week. For us it happened with big bang hearts, we were all over each other from the beginning.

Did you used to hang around in the boys “lav” on the second floor back at North Adamsville Junior High? Probably not if you were one of Frankie Riley’s corner boys because you guys, Frankie anyway, hung around the “lav” next to the cafeteria. The reason I ask is that before Kate I used to be, well, all over all the girls whether they liked me or not. And I would brag about it in boys’ lav. Lying like a crazy man, lying worse than Frankie Riley, that this girl or that did everything known to mankind with me. But with Kate I was like you said in your piece “formerly full of boasts and bravados in that mandatory Monday morning before school boys’ “lav” talkfest about who did or did not do what with whom over the weekend fell silent, would not speak her name in such bluster.” Kate said you hit her right on the nose too except I know you had never been in the girls’ “ lav” when you said “She, she in that mandatory Monday morning before school girls’ “lav” talkfest about who did or did not do what with whom just smiled, a private smile, she had her man.” We  laughed, laughed about that one night down at the beach once we settled (kind of settled) that issue of what was, and was not, appropriate when we were watching the “submarine races.”  That was the first time we said we would stay together forever. Forever being, I think as such things went, maybe the next year, or until the next best thing came along            

As it turned out the next best thing was sitting right next to each of us and so we, maybe a little fearful, maybe a little worried about whether we would last or not tied the knot right after high school. I went off to the Vietnam War not long after and then to school on the GI Bill and then got that job in the research department of Gillette. All along Kate though would wait and worry, worry about how we would provide for the coming children. They came, the three of them, Janice, Kenny, and Claudia. They made our time a little easier (mostly).

Jesus you should have been a marriage counsellor or something, what the heck with three marriages you would be a natural, since you hit the point about the “bumps in the road, he, getting a little thicker around the waist, looked off in the distance and she, well, she went on an exercise regime as they both wondered in the night what had happened.” Both of us, once the kids were older, almost, almost I said, had affairs with people who were our friends, in my case a close friend and colleague at work, and let me leave it at that, okay. We did not, believe me we did not talk about that last week, but I know I then I was feverishly tossing in the night with thoughts about leaving, thinking about after twenty-five years what would do I without her (and maybe her me), about where would I go and how when we were young we had loved each other so. Those fevers passed, although we lost good friends and it was hard sometimes at work when I would see the gal looking kind of forlorn when I came near her office. Funny later after the kids left the house and had kids of their own and we became “empty nesters” I took up golf and Kate shopping, shopping until she dropped which she used to hate, for the newest grandchild and we both would have those night sweat dreams we had when we were thinking about having our respective affairs. But those moments too passed, remembering back to our old time pledges.        

I, we, Catholic forever married or not, could never figure out why in the modern world where everyone is supposed to change spouses, partners, lovers with the changing seasons, we had to almost defend ourselves because we decided to spend our time on earth together. Now we know we marked our love with the flow of time.   

I couldn’t understand in your piece who that woman was up in Maine that you mentioned, other than that she was a classmate of ours, do you know her, was she one of your affairs or flings it seems like you knew a lot about her, Couldn’t understand why on a cold December night she stood against a frosted window in a lonely dark room looking out with a vacant expression at the swirl of the ocean before her. Couldn’t figure out her being there alone while she stood thinking about that first marriage gone wrong when that first husband went chasing after a younger woman. Also about that second foolish marriage to some charming chameleon who had used her as a meal ticket. And couldn’t understand why she thought about that short recent affair that had held so much promise in the first days, felt like maybe he would be her forever man but you see he was married, married all along to some other idea. I (and Kate too) did understand why she sighed though.

Couldn’t understand either that classmate, was that you disguising yourself as somebody out West when I know you live near Boston, down in some Southern California town changing companions with the seasons? From the sound of it and what you said in your piece it sure sounded like your situation. There he was thinking about how he had raised holy hell in his first marriage, had married out of fear, fear of being alone when the hammer of his life went down. How he blushed at that horror of a second marriage where he let his every addiction, affliction and predilection destroy whatever good instincts he had left.   Or when he wondered if that short splendid recent affair that he had tried to make work, make work out of a different fear, a fear of being left alone in his old age when the hammer went down might not have worked out because he could not commit, could not risk the return of those addictions. And about how he smirked as he thought about that, thought about how his whole life revolved around two women, the one that he was with at the moment and that one in his head, and in his dreams just beyond his grasp who he wanted to be with. Sounds like he was not built for forever stuff kind of like you.   

We, Kate and me, think people should stand in awe, definitely stand in awe of our steadfastness like you said. And our love.  So thanks for agreeing with what we made of our lives and sorry, very sorry, Frank to hear that you didn’t fare so well.  Your old classmates, Jeff and Kate Turner       

***Wasn’t That A Mighty Storm-The Life And Times Of Folksinger/Songwriter Tom Rush-No Regrets  

 

 

 

DVD Review

From The Pen Od Frank Jackman

No Regrets, a documentary starring Tom Rush, 2014

Several years ago I did a series entitled Not Bob Dylan: Other Male Voices Of The 1960s Folk Minute where I tried to highlight those male folksingers (and songwriters) who for whatever reason did not wind up doing Brother Dylan’s never-ending tour (and now never-ending bootleg series of CDs as well). Many like Jim Kweskin, Geoff Muldaur, David Bromberg just kind of faded out as the folk minute lost much of its allure, and its ability to sustain livelihoods (although the example above have resurfaced lately in the coffeehouse/folk festival circuit sounding very good by the way). Some were relatively one-hit wonders and we know what that means, they are now working some other career. Others, like the folksinger/songwriter under review. Tom Rush, in his latest documentary kept their fingers in but moved into a less heated, hectic environment that endlessly touring and trying to produce the next great folk song. This DVD, put out by the same producers who put out the anniversary documentary a few years back on the Club 47 in Cambridge when Bob, Joan Baez and Tom made musical history, hits the highlights of the career (really careers) of an important figure in that 1960s folk minute.   

As in any biographical documentary, the Tom Rush story starts out with a little material about his childhood, about his adopted childhood up in New Hampshire (with an interesting aside about his later discovered relationship with his birth father) with teacher parents who pushed Tom to educational excellence but also provided an environment where he could develop his musical skills. Skills that when the folk minute in Cambridge intersected his time as an undergraduate student at Harvard (and as a Harvard radio DJ) gave him an opportunity to become one of the then iconic folksingers of the time.     

Interestingly the road to musical success was as usual with lots of careers two steps forward, one step back as Tom tried to get a record contract (absolutely necessary then to get airplay, airplay on the local radio station, WBZ, that a lot of us listened to every Sunday night to see what the latest folk minute minute was about). Success at the Club 47 led to other engagements in the Boston area and Greenwich Village and steady work for a long period of time as he made, unlike some  others, the transition to the post- Bob Dylan electrified folk rock scene. Then some burn-out, some personal difficulties and a desire to not travel as much. That is the period when he began his very successful Boston Symphony Hall winter shows, his ventures into record production highlighting newer folk talent needing a start, writing, and, strangely, although not for a New Hampshire boy perhaps, a period as a gentleman-farmer. In all a useful life, a life that now includes periodic forays out into the now shrinking coffeehouse folk circuit that sustains the music (and where I saw him last year). A good one and one half hour documentary about what happened to one of the important, if lesser, lights of that folk minute when we thought we would turn the world upside down with our music, our counter-cultural experiment and our alternative politics, and make a gentler, more peaceful world to live in.        

***A Tale Of Two Women- The Saga Of Sam Lowell-Take Two

 

From The Pen Of Frank Jackman

Melinda Loring sat across the high-back café table from Sam Lowell at Rummy Jack’s up in Old Hampstead one chilly March afternoon (that’s in New Hampshire not far from where she lived) with a frown on her face (a permanent Sam sometimes thought but he would not utter that sentiment this day). She was speaking to Sam, without rancor (or maybe better with controlled rancor, yes, that would be a better way to put the matter) and without malice softly, as was her manner, as she told Sam that he had “two women now, whether he liked it or not, whether he recognized the situation or not.” And that short precise statement set the tone for that afternoon, and for the slippery slope downward that brought their affair to an end so that at last notice they had not spoken to each other, had not e-mailed each other in months. But we had better step back in this Melinda-Sam saga before we go forward where those words of Melinda will get more play than one Samuel Lowell, North Adamsville High School Class of 1964 could have imagined when he decided innocently that he wanted in on his class’s 50^th anniversary reunion celebration. 

Naturally one does not wind up at Rummy Jack’s having a late lunch with one woman (of that “spoken of ” two but more on number two later), one old classmate to boot, without some discussion of their pre-history, some discussion of how that insistent “two women” comment came forth from Melinda’s mouth, since this pair had not known each other back in high school (although Sam had given her many furtive glances in the corridors back then, had made something of a science out of those glances, she just ignored him, or better, was clueless about who he was and what he was doing to “connect” with her back then. That however never stopped those furtive glances of his back then or later whenever he was interested in a woman, no way). They had only recently connected via the class website established by the class reunion committee (of which Sam had become a part before he “met” Melinda on the site).

That off-hand class website “meeting” turned from a simple welcome on Sam’s part as “unofficial” greeter as classmates became members of the site where he remarked when she joined about those long ago furtive glances of his and a short comment about how guys he respected told him that Melinda was “unapproachable” and he had moved on into a frantic furious exchange of e-mails when they found that while they had not known each other back then they shared many academic, social, political, literary and personal connections and interests.  (Wondering, both wondering, aloud in those frantic e-mails, he had made her laugh with their urgency once when he said that he hoped they would not run out of cyberspace, why the hell they had not met back then). The frantic e-mails eventually led to frantic cellphone calls (she liked his voice, liked his soft-spoken-ness, he liked her fresh spirit, her organized sense of things) which naturally led to that first date where she called him in an emotional moment of delight (prematurely, very prematurely, as it turned out) her “forever” man and he, a little slower on the uptake than she and more neutral about that first date (although when she took his arm walking he did not flinch, liked her boldness so early) was smitten with her after the second date. (They both remarked in the inevitable later e-mail or cellphone call that their parting that night was hard neither wanting to leave the other after big hugs and he caressing her hair to comfort her when she teared up.)

Well first date, second date, “forever” man, smitten all added up to going under the satin sheets together. (Even that occurrence although both thought the event inevitable when they both believed they affair was written in the stars had a certain unintended drama, a false start when he had invited her to his hotel room one night, before they actually did the “do the do”-their term borrowed from a Howlin’ Wolf song.) All along in those fierce devoted weeks there was an upward curve that one could almost trace with one’s finger but also a slight tension underlying their plans for the future. Sam, thinking about it later though the whole curve seemed impossible, seemed impossible that they could move so quickly, especially on her part since she was organized sensible one of the two, no question. Then the other shoe fell.

See Sam was smitten, but he was also conflicted, was not sure where he wanted the relationship to go. Was not sure he and Melinda had staying power. Hell, was not sure about how he felt about Laura. Laura? Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you the name of the second woman before. Sam had had a long- time relationship with Laura, a companion whom Melinda was aware of and who Sam said to her had become, after having been lovers for a number of years, something like roommates. See they shared a house together down in Whelan (in Massachusetts which is where he lived and which was one of the points of contention between Sam ad Melinda since she wanted him to come up and live with her in New Hampshire). Well that “roommate” explanation is what he gave Melinda to believe, and he confessed to her later that he thought that was the right designation then, but as the Sam-Melinda relationship developed he had confront the fact that he had stronger feelings for Laura than he let on to Melinda. Had developed some “cold feet” when the idea of breaking up the Sam-Laura household came into the open. Came into the open as Melinda pressed the issue of Sam’s leaving his old relationship. Cold feet not because he was unsure of Melinda so much as that he would be leaving his “comfort zone” to be with Melinda and and was unsure how much he wanted to spent a lot of time up in the Podunk New Hampshire town where she lived. The stars were becoming unaligned.   

It does not take a great literary mind, a great knowledge of human psychology, or even a treasure trove of common sense, to know that nothing but trouble was brewing, brewing up a storm that would not subside until there was not common language that Sam and Melinda could speak to each other. Naturally Melinda, a woman who had been twice divorced, twice divorced under trying circumstances where she had to initiate the proceedings and wanted only one “forever” man and her to be his forever woman. She had made it clear from the beginning that she was a “one man woman” and that she wanted no fling and no affair but the real deal with all the bells and whistles or nothing (although not marriage, not that institution which she had had enough of, thank you).

She worked her understanding of their relationship under that strategic imperative all through their few months together, pressing Sam as often as she could about when he was going to leave Laura (at one point suggesting that he just move out of Whelan and get a place of his own if he was not ready to live with her). See she had her plans for Sam and they did not include any kind of three-some, in reality her as the “other” woman (truthfully Sam did not want that either) or some such “modern” arrangement. Sam hemmed and hawed but as he got more interested in Melinda, got a better sense that she would be good for him, would be good in a way that Laura and he could not do anymore, got more committed to leaving Laura since they had hit a very serious dry patch in their relationship he would still have recurring second thoughts. One night he yelled out to Melinda (after having said the exact words to Laura earlier in the day) that he had “given up” on Laura and he said he was just waiting for an excuse to move on. Melinda meanwhile was getting more and more anxious about putting a life for of them together (they after all were not sixteen, although they both laughed that in some ways they were acting like that, had not outgrown some teenage quirks) and time was an enemy. And that urgency on Melinda’s part brought them to Rummy Jack’s that cold march afternoon after they had exchanged a couple of acrimonious e-mails and decided they needed to meet quickly face to face to hash things out, or split if that was in the cards. That split perspective came out in the open for the first time. And hence Melinda’s opening statement.   

Sam, when he thought about the break-up, thought about it constantly for a while, had never been sure about the what or why of Melinda’s breaking off the affair shortly after that lunch (and after another series of acrimonious e-mails and cellphone calls). Was not sure at all on that subject beyond the tense arguments at the end (including at Rummy Jack’s where they almost got into a yelling match there and later   while walking the beach to try and calm down using the ocean waves to smooth things out, if possible) and one ill-advised e-mail where he proposed that they become “friends” for a while. (An ill-advised e-mail which she called a “closing argument” and he a “love letter” to show how far apart they had were then.) That abrupt ending bothered Sam considerable over the next few months while he absent-mindedly speculated that she might had decided to go back with man who she had dropped when she took up with him, might have had enough of the “two woman” drama (as had he), or maybe just got her own version of cold feet but in any case she would not answer his calls, answer his e-mails for an explanation except to tell him not to call or e-mail any longer.

Prior to this final dismissal Melinda had kept putting him off for a couple of weeks, told Sam  they should be apart that long to see if she felt the same after that time and if so would close the whole thing off. But this is what really had (has) Sam more confused than anything because he had actually told Laura he was leaving her for Melinda during this period when Melinda was in the process of dumping him (his word, she called it “breaking off the relationship,” I favor Sam’s term). Fortunately, or so he thought so later when he had calmed down enough to think rationally about the situation and realized that was just another aspect of those second thoughts that had plagued their relationship, he had hedged his bets with Laura, had sensed that Melinda’s decision would be negative, and made that leaving of their joint household in Whelan conditional on what Melinda’s final decision was to be.

Naturally Laura was not thrilled with Sam behavior. Hell, she was as angry as he had ever seen her since all along he had downplayed his affair with Melinda declaring one night when she confronted him that they were “just friends.” Almost left the house right then and there when he explained the real situation with Melinda. Laura, a soft-spoken, pacifistic woman   almost hit him on another later night when Sam burst out during one conversation that he had “two women” and had unfortunately said it with a certain dramatic flair saying in such a way like “what is a guy to do with such good luck.” She would bring that remark up constantly to him when after Melinda’s decision to split became final and Sam in a desperate effort to salvage his long-time relationship with Laura and not face the wicked old world alone begged her forgiveness they decided that they would stay together. She would bring the remark up to friends to embarrass him, to make him seem the fool having “left” Laura for, ah, a “never” woman. Made it plain that he only had only had one woman now. Or else.

But see that is where Laura was wrong, where the ghost of Melinda really had the last laugh. After Melinda dumped him he kept constantly thinking about her, tried to unsuccessfully contact her a couple of times before letting the efforts fade out. Thought, alongside that confusion about why Melinda decided to dump him, about ways and times when they might try to reconcile in his head. Thought, almost daily, about what a fool he had been to tell Laura he was leaving without a better understanding of Melinda’s actions, how Melinda had made a fool of him dumping him just when he had decided in her favor, about how foolish he had been to hem and haw over Melinda when he knew their thing was written in the stars, and would get angry at the thought that Melinda for all her words, all her plans, was not built for tough times as he had thought. Alternatively he would think about that first night of love together giggling like two teenagers, of times when they talked and talked all night heads next to each other just to be together, of the times when she took his arm and he caressed her hair to comfort her, and of little things she did to make him happy which he didn’t appreciate nearly enough.

For a long time afterward on many lonesome-hearted nights when he would be sitting with Laura talking over dinner he would be thinking of Melinda, thinking about how their thing had really been written in the stars after all and that he had made a mistake in not trying desperately to keep her when he had the chance. Would find himself thinking about Melinda in lots of situations and at strange times. Would get kind of swoony, would make up ways in his head about fantasy reconciliations. Yeah, so in the dark of night, some sweaty summer night when he could not sleep Sam knew, knew deep down that he still had “two women,” Melinda still had her hooks in him, and he was still missing his Linny.   

 

As The 100th Anniversary Of The Beginning of World War I (Remember The War To End All Wars) Starts ... Some Remembrances-Poet’s Corner-Siegfried Sassoon's The Poet As Hero  

The Poet as Hero

You've heard me, scornful, harsh, and discontented,

Mocking and loathing War: you've asked me why

Of my old, silly sweetness I've repented--

My ecstasies changed to an ugly cry.

You are aware that once I sought the Grail,

Riding in armour bright, serene and strong;

And it was told that through my infant wail

There rose immortal semblances of song.

But now I've said good-bye to Galahad,

And am no more the knight of dreams and show:

For lust and senseless hatred make me glad,

And my killed friends are with me where I go.

Wound for red wound I burn to smite their wrongs;

And there is absolution in my songs.

 

Local Events

Hi Kevin, Although we have let you know about some of these opportunities before, we trust a reminder is okay.  As always, we edit for brevity. - JVP Boston As the cease-fire breaks down and the bombings resume, Boston continues to stand in solidarity with Gaza.  See below for upcoming events. Sunday, August 17 Special Report from the Occupied Territories 6 PM - Potluck 7 PM - Presentation Newton, MA Call Joan Ecklein at 617 244 8054 for directions(leave message.) Dear Kevin, Please join Jewish Voice for Peace - Boston at the upcoming events listed below. Note the Mass March for Gaza this coming Monday as well as the August 17th talk in Newton. Please let people you know in Newton and Brookline about this opportunity. --- Mass March for Gaza Monday, August 11 at 5:30pm City Hall Plaza, Boston a growing list of co-sponsors With over 1900 Palestinians killed already in the Israeli assault on Gaza, please join us in a march of solidarity with the Palestinian people to demonstrate against the US government's enabling role in the massacre, including the $3 billion in aid every year as well as its unconditional political support for the land siege and naval blockade that renders Gaza as the world's largest "open air prison." The march will also target Hewlett Packard (HP), one of the companies complicit in the occupation and colonization of Palestinian lands, and hence a target for the Palestinian called - and led - Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions (BDS) movement. Besides providing numerous  services to the IDF, HP developed and maintains the automated biometric access management system that controls the movement of Palestinians and specifically Palestinian workers through checkpoints in the West Bank and Gaza. Read more about HP at http://wedivest.org/c/57/hp#.U-I9UfldXGA. We will be gathering at City Hall Plaza. We will then move to the JFK Federal Building, from where the rally and march begins around 5:30pm. https://www.facebook.com/events/812176275483913/ --- Special Report from the Occupied Territories                                 Sunday, August 17, 6:00 Potluck; presentation at 7:00. Newton. Call Joan Ecklein at 617 244 8054 for directions(leave message.) Cosponsored by: Women's International League for Peace and Freedom, Newton Dialogues on Peace and War, UJP Palestine Task Force, Massachusetts Peace Action "The Gaza  Crisis and Growing Palestinian Resistance: a First-hand view from the West Bank," A talk by Nora Murad. Nora has lived in the Occupied Territories for more than ten years and has close contacts with youth  in Gaza.  She was in Ramallah this July during the Israeli attack. She is a co-founder of the Dalia Association on the West Bank; Dalia provides material aid directly to community projects formulated and organized by local people. She has extensive first hand knowledge of the impact of the Occupation and grass roots resistance to it. She is also well connected to Gaza residents struggling to survive under horrific conditions. Nora is a writer and mother living in Palestine. Her blog: "The View From My Window in Palestine" (www.noralestermurad.com) addresses issues of development, international aid, and daily life under military occupation. Before she moved to Palestine in 2004, Nora was assistant professor of cross-cultural understanding at Bentley College. --- Jewish Voice for Peace Boston: Gathering Sunday, August 17th, 6-8 PM Make Shift Boston, 549 Columbus Ave Sad and angry about the news from Gaza?  Looking for ways to respond? In this time of mourning, action, and solidarity, join with JVP Boston to hear updates and plug into our work for Gaza in the short and long term.  Pizza will be provided, and we’ll end in a community mourning ritual. Both new and longtime activists welcome. Please RSVP Here With Sorrow and Resolve, Jewish Voice for Peace - Boston Contact Info: Jewish Voice for Peace 1611 Telegraph Ave, Suite 550 Oakland, CA 94612 510.465.1777 info@jewishvoiceforpeace.org Connect with Us: Become a 2014 JVP Member | Facebook | Twitter | Flickr | Forward Subscribe to our blog Muzzlewatch

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Dear All, We are at a crossroads, faced with a climate crisis that threatens to end our world as we know it. We can’t afford the greenhouse gas emissions arising from the way we live and from war and preparation for war.  Reserve Bus Tickets Now: bit.ly/pcm-bus.  1-day or 2-day trips. Departures from Cambridge, Jamaica Plain, Worcester, Amherst, and Rhode Island. Sign up to let us know you'll be there and march with the Stop the Wars, Stop the Warming contingent! Massachusetts Peace Action calls on all who want to preserve our planet to join the People’s Climate March in New York City on September 21st and to form a Stop the Wars, Stop the Warming Contingent.  The People's Climate March will be the largest climate protest ever.  World leaders are coming to New York City for a UN summit on the climate crisis. UN Secretary­ General Ban Ki-­moon is urging governments to support an ambitious global agreement to dramatically reduce global warming pollution.   With our future on the line and the whole world watching, we’ll take a stand to bend the course of history. We’ll take to the streets to demand the world we know is within our reach: a world with an economy that works for people and the planet; a world safe from the ravages of climate change; a world with good jobs, clean air and water, and healthy communities. We go to New York with the following demands: Re-direct military spending to the creation of millions of green jobs and to research for a rapid transition from fossil fuels to non-polluting energy sources. Stop building new fossil fuel infrastructure, including the Keystone pipeline project.  Rapidly end fracking projects and the awarding of any new offshore drilling contracts Move quickly toward mutual abolition of all nuclear weapons as required by the Nuclear Non-Prolif­eration Treaty. Stop blocking the proposals for effective inter­national action on climate change being put forward by the Group of 77 and other devel­oping coun­tries. We can’t effectively address climate change without ending war and militarism and the massive carbon pollution which they directly and indirectly generate. And we can’t end war without ending the fossil fuel energy system which war protects. Read Stop the Wars, Stop the Warming: An Appeal to the Peace and Climate Movements. Date: September 21st, Sunday Time: 12:00pm-5:00pm Location: New York City Reserve Bus Tickets Now: bit.ly/pcm-bus.  1-day or 2-day trips. Departures from Cambridge, Jamaica Plain, Worcester, Amherst, and Rhode Island. People’s Climate March: Peace & Justice Hub • peoplesclimate.org/peace Dig deep into the issues at the NYC Climate Convergence, Friday, Sept. 19 evening and Saturday, Sept. 20.  Empire State College, New York City Stop the Wars, Stop the Warming Professor Charles Derber, Boston College Professor Derber is a public sociologist whose research and teaching focus on political economy, political sociology, environmental sociology, and social change. Recent topics of his books and ocurse include the economic crisis, globalization, corporations and society, climate change, the sociology of war and peace, and social movements.  His current work focuses on globalization, corporate power, American militarism, the culture of hegemony, and the new peace and global justice movements. The world is becoming as dominated by business values and power today as America was by the Robber Barons a century ago. Derber is persuaded that the overwhelming economic and cultural power of global corporations, increasingly melded with the political and military hegemonic power of the American government and the crisis of climate change, are together an integrated crisis that is now the pre-eminent social issue of the 21st century, and that we need a new vision and political movement that can offer an alternative. Date: August 28th, Thursday Time: 7:00pm Location: Encuentro 5, 9 Hamilton Place, Boston, MA (Across from Park Street Station) Hot War: Climate Change, Conflict and Sustainability How climate change will provoke world conflict...and why sustainability is the only sure road to peace.  Michael Klare, Five College professor of peace and world security studies, and director of the Five College Program in Peace and World Security Studies (PAWSS), holds a B.A. and M.A. from Columbia University and a Ph.D. from the Graduate School of the Union Institute. He has written widely on U.S. military policy, international peace and security affairs, the global arms trade, and global resource politics. "Iraq, Syria, Nigeria, South Sudan, Ukraine, the East and South China Seas: wherever you look, the world is aflame with new or intensifying conflicts.  At first glance, these upheavals appear to be independent events, driven by their own unique and idiosyncratic circumstances.  But look more closely and they share several key characteristics— notably, a witch’s brew of ethnic, religious, and national antagonisms that have been stirred to the boiling point by a fixation on energy.... It would be easy to attribute all this to age-old hatreds, as suggested by many analysts; but while such hostilities do help drive these conflicts, they are fueled by a most modern impulse as well: the desire to control valuable oil and natural gas assets.  Make no mistake about it, these are twenty-first-century energy wars." Date: September 11th, Thursday Time: 7:00pm-9:00pm Location: TBA (Boston/Cambridge) Sponsor: United for Justice with Peace People's Climate Tour The People’s Climate Tour will bring a diverse and inspiring array of social movement leaders on the intersection of climate change and social justice, and how you can get involved in this movement of movements. -Bill McKibben - author, educator, environmentalist, co-founder of 350.org -Vanessa Rule - Co-Director of Mothers Out Front, co-founder of Better Future Project -Koreti Mavaega Tiumalu - Pacific Islands Climate Warrior Campaigner -Sandra Steingraber - Biologist, author, and science advisor for Americans Against Fracking -Varshini Prakash - UMass Amherst student, Board Member at Responsible Endowments Coalition and Divestment Student Network -And more! Date: Friday, August 22 Time: 7:00pm-9:00pm Location: Boston Opera House, 538 Tremont St. (Chinatown or Boylston T) Buy Tickets: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/building-a-movement-of-movements-towards-the-peoples-climate-march-in-nyc-tickets-12358629995 For peace and sustainability, Rosalie Anders Peace-Climate Working Group Join Massachusetts Peace Action - or renew your membership today!   Dues are $40/year for an individual, $65 for a family, or $10 for student/unemployed/low income.  Members vote for leadership and endorsements, receive newsletters and discounts on event admissions.  Donate now and you will be a member in good standing through December 2014! Your financial support makes this work possible! Massachusetts Peace Action, 11 Garden St., Cambridge, MA 02138 617-354-2169  • info@masspeaceaction.org • Follow us on Facebook or Twitter Click here to unsubscribe