The Gang That Couldn’t Rob Straight- Owen Wilson's Masterminds (2016)-A Film Review
DVD Review
By Sam Lowell
Masterminds, starring Owen Wilson, 2016
Sometimes when a friend recommends a film it turns out to be
a dud, turns out to be less than expected and in the case of the film under
review, Masterminds, make that much
less than expected considering the cast. Makes one wonder why a great comedic
actor like Owen Wilson took the job, took the chance to work on a funky film
that had a chance to go in one of two directions, a straight line comic look at
a true story or a farce that bombed. It took the latter. The direction toward
the farcical led the vehicle astray when all is said and done.
Here is the skinny, here is why the title of this piece can
be called the gang that couldn’t rob straight taking a page from an old Jimmy
Breslin book. The story line based on a true incident about the doings around one
of the great cash robberies in banking history, the Loomis heist in North
Carolina 1997 for seventeen big ones-17 mil, okay not chicken feed then nor
now. David Scott Ghantt, a security guard on a Lommis armored truck was
hook-winked, no make that bewitched and bewildered by his sexy armored truck
partner, Kelly, who had walked out on
the job over some harassment. A while later she wound up working hand and hand
with a low-life short end of the stick criminal Steve, played by Wilson, who
wants her to con, I am being kind here since this is a family sensitive outlet,
David into being the inside man on a big heist of the company’s loot. David
balked at first but Kelly lured him with her charms despite the fact he was two
minutes to midnight away from getting married to another woman.
The heist was a piece of cake for an inside job and David
was told to lay low in Mexico until the coast was clear. The false lure was
Kelly joining him soon, yeah, soon. The idea Steve thought though was that
David was to get the short end of the straw, was the odd man out as he, Steve,
was not going to share the dough with anybody but his loving wife and two
unlovable kids. Meanwhile David was still forlornly expecting Kelly to join him
in Mexico. Sucker. Double sucker because Steve threw the Feds onto him and he
led them a merry chase before he got wise to what Steve, and Kelly, were up to.
Steve in a panic, putting greed before good sense, ordered a hit on David by a
screwball hit man who couldn’t hit right-as was to be expected. They wind up
switching same identities (it’s a long unfunny story so just go along with me)
so that David wound up at Steve’s over-the-top mansion ready to get even.
And he does in a way after the Feds got definitive proof
that low-life greedy Steve and not pure-heart David was the evil mastermind
behind the caper. Steve did 11 years, David pure-heart drew seven and Kelly a
bunch too. With that enticing story-line it was a shame that the film was
marred with so many unfunny slapstick jokes, some much low-rent bathroom humor
and such a waste of an obviously talented cast. Yeah, what was Owen Wilson
thinking. Some day when they do a retrospective of his work this one will not
be included, I hope.
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