The Roots Is The Toots: The Music That Got The Generation Of
’68 Through The 1950s Red Scare Cold War Night-Billie’s
Break-Out Adventure-With Elvis’ Are
You Lonesome Tonight In Mind
From The Pen Of Frank Jackman
Are you lonesome tonight,
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?
Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
I wonder if you're lonesome tonight
You know someone said that the world's a stage
And each must play a part.
Fate had me playing in love you as my sweet heart.
Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance
You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue
Then came act two, you seemed to change and you acted strange
And why I'll never know.
Honey, you lied when you said you loved me
And I had no cause to doubt you.
But I'd rather go on hearing your lies
Than go on living without you.
Now the stage is bare and I'm standing there
With emptiness all around
And if you won't come back to me
Then make them bring the curtain down.
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?
Do the chairs in your parlor seem empty and bare?
Do you gaze at your doorstep and picture me there?
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
I wonder if you're lonesome tonight
You know someone said that the world's a stage
And each must play a part.
Fate had me playing in love you as my sweet heart.
Act one was when we met, I loved you at first glance
You read your line so cleverly and never missed a cue
Then came act two, you seemed to change and you acted strange
And why I'll never know.
Honey, you lied when you said you loved me
And I had no cause to doubt you.
But I'd rather go on hearing your lies
Than go on living without you.
Now the stage is bare and I'm standing there
With emptiness all around
And if you won't come back to me
Then make them bring the curtain down.
Is your heart filled with pain, shall I come back again?
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
“I hate Elvis, I love Elvis,” Sam
Lowell could still hear fifty years later the echo of his old from nowhere down
and out low-rent public assistance “the
projects” corner boy, William James Bradley, also known as Billie. Not Billy
like some billy-goat, like some damn animal, as he declaimed to all who would
listen, mainly Sam toward the end before Sam had to move away from the
neighborhood or get caught up in Billie’s then new found interest in small
handle crime when the better angel of his nature fled in horror at his
fresh-worn path after the umpteenth failure to get what he thought was his due
legally. Billie from the hills, born out in some mad night, born out of some
untamed passion in New Hampshire to newly-wed parents just before the shot-gun,
some father’s shot-gun, called out in the wilds of Nashua up in live free
country New Hampshire. Billie Bradley a mad demon of a kid and Sam’s best
friend down in the Adamsville South Elementary school located smack in the
middle of that from-nowhere-down-and-out-low-rent-the-projects of ill-fated
memory. Sam and Billie grew apart after a while, after those Billie hurts grew
too huge to be contained this side of the law, and we will learn why in a
minute, but for a long time, a long kid time long, Billie, Billie of a hundred
dreams, Billie of fifty (at least) screw-ups made Sam laugh and made his day
when things were tough, like they almost always were at his beat down
broke-down family house.
Sam thought and laughed thinking that,
you know, fifty some years later Billie was right. We hated Elvis, we young
boys, we what do they call them now, oh yes, those tween boys, those times
before we know what was what in our new feelings, our funny feelings that no
one, well, no parent would explain to us, knew what was what about those stick
girls turning to shapes and adding fuel to the fire of our funny feelings, oh what a time of
lamenting, especially at that time when all the girls, the young girls got
weak-kneed over Elvis and he made the
older girls (and women, some mothers even) sweat and left no room for ordinary
mortal boys, “the projects boys” most of all, on their “dream” card. And most
especially, hard as we tried, for brown-haired or tow-headed, blue-eyed ten,
eleven and twelve year old boys who didn’t know how to dance. Dance like some
Satan’s disciple as Elvis did in Jailhouse
Rock every move calculated to make some furious female night sweats dreams.
Or when we had to give up in despair
after failing to produce a facsimile of that Elvis sneer that sneer that only
got them, the girls, more excited as they dreamed about taking that sneer off
his face and making him, well, happy. We both, Billie and me, got pissed off at
my brother, my older brother, Prescott, who already had half a stake in some
desperate outlaw schemes and would later crumble under the weight of too many
jail terms, because, he looked very much like Elvis and although he had no
manners, and no time for girls, they were all following him around like he was
the second coming. I don’t think he cared and he would certainly not listen to
me about what I could do to get the girls. When Billie caught up with him later
they were not worried about girls, or not principally about girls, but about
small-bore armed robberies of penny-ante gas stations for six dollars and
change. Christ there really is no justice in this wicked old world, either way.
And we loved Elvis too for giving us,
us young impressionable boys at least as far as we knew then, our own music,
our own "jump' and our own jail-break from the tired old stuff we heard on
the radio and television that did not ‘”speak” to us. The stuff that our
parents dreamed by if they dreamed, or had dreamed by when their worlds were
fresh and young back before we were born, back in that endless Great Depression
night and World War II slugfest that they were “protecting” us against such
repetitions, and not succeeding. If they had had time for dreams what with
trying to make ends meet and avoiding bill-collectors, dunners, and repo men by
the score each and every day. We loved Elvis
for the songs that he left behind. Not the goofy Tin Pan Alley or something like that inspired “happy” music that went
along with his mostly maligned, and rightly so, films but the stuff from the
Sun Records days, the stuff from when he was “from hunger”. That music, as we
also “from hunger,” was like a siren call to break-out and then we caught his
act on television, maybe the Ed Sullivan
Show or something like that, and that was that. I probably walk “funny,” knees
and hips out of whack, today from trying way back then to pour a third-rate
imitation of his moves into my body to impress the girls.
But enough of Elvis’ place in the
pre-teen and teen rock pantheon this is after all about Billie, and Elvis’
twisted spell on the poor boy. Now you know about Billie dreams, about his
outlandish dreams to break-out of the projects by parlaying his good looks (and
they were even then) and his musical abilities (good but the world was filled
with Billies from hunger and on reflection he did not have that crooner’s voice
that would make the girls weep and get wet) or you should, from another story,
a story about Bo Diddley and how Billie wanted to, as a change of pace, break
from the Elvis rut to create his own “style.” That was to emulate old Bo and
his Afro-Carib beat. What Billie did not know, could not know since he had no
television in the house (nor did my family so we always went to neighbors who
did have one or watched in front of Raymond’s Department Store with their
inviting televisions on in the display windows begging us to purchase them) and
only knew rock and roll from his transistor radio was that the guy, that old Bo
was black. Well, in hard, hard post-World War II Northern white Adamsville
"the projects" filled to the brim with racial animosity poor
unknowing Billie got blasted away one night at a talent show by one of the
older, more knowing boys who taunted him mercilessly about why he wanted to
emulate a n----r for his troubles.
That sent Billie, Billie from the
hills, back to white bread Elvis pronto. See, Billie was desperate to impress
the girls way before I was aware of them, or their charms. Half, on some days,
three-quarters of our conversations (I won’t say monologues because I did get a
word in edgewise every once in a while when Billie got on one of his rants)
revolved around doing this or that, something legal, something not, to impress
the girls. And that is where the “hate Elvis” part mentioned above comes in.
Billie believed, and he may still believe it today wherever he is, that if only
he could approximate Elvis’ looks, look, stance, and substance that all the
girls would be flocking to him. And by flocking would create a buzz that would
be heard around the world. Nice dream, Billie, nice my brother.
Needless to say, such an endeavor
required, requires money, dough, kale, cash, moola whatever you want to call
it. And what twelve-year old project boys didn’t have, and didn’t have in
abundance was any of that do-re-mi (that’s the age time of this story, about
late 1957, early 1958) And no way to get it from missing parents, messed up
parents, or just flat out poor parents. Billie’s and mine were the latter, poor
as church mice. No, that‘s not right because church mice would not do (in the
way that I am using it, and as we used it back then to signify the respectable
poor who “touted” their Catholic pious poorness as a badge of honor in this
weaseling wicked old world), would not think about, would not even breathe the
same air of what we were about to embark on. A life of crime, kid stuff crime
but I'll leave that to the reader’s judgment.
See, on one of Billie’s rants he got
the idea in his head, and, maybe, it got planted there by something that he had
read about Elvis (Christ, he read more about that guy that he did about anybody
else once he became an acolyte), that if he had a bunch of rings on all his
fingers the girls would give him a tumble. (A tumble in those days being a hard
kiss on the lips for about twelve seconds or “copping” a little feel, and if I
have to explain that last in more detail you had better just move on). But see,
also Billie’s idea was that if he has all those rings, especially for a
projects boy then it would make his story that he had set to tell easier. And
the story was none other than that he had written to Elvis (possible) and spoke
to him man to man about his situation (improbable) and Elvis, Elvis the king,
Elvis from “nowhere Mississippi, some place like Tupelo, like we were from the
nowhere Adamsville projects, Elvis bleeding heart, had sent him the rings to
give him a start in life (outrageously impossible). Christ, I don’t believe old
Billie came up with that story even now when I am a million years world-weary.
First you needed the rings and as
the late honorable bank robber, Willie Sutton, said about robbing banks-that’s
where the money is-old Billie, blessed, beatified Billie, figured out, and
figured out all by himself, that if you want to be a ring-stealer then you
better go to the jewelry store because that is where the rings were. The
reader, and rightly so, now might ask where was his best buddy during this time
and why was that best buddy not offering wise counsel about the pitfalls of
crime and the virtues of honesty and incorruptibility. Well, when Billie went
off on his rant you just waited to see what played out but the real reason was,
hell, maybe I could get a ring for my ring-less fingers and be on my way to
impress the girls too. I think they call it in the law books, or some zealous
prosecuting attorney could call it, aiding and abetting.
But enough of that superficial
moralizing. Let’s get to the jewelry store, the best one in the downtown of
working-class Adamsville in the time before the ubiquitous malls. We walked a
couple of miles to get there on the one road out of the peninsula where the
projects were located, plotting all the way. As we entered the downtown area,
Bingo, the Acme Jewelry Store (or some name like that) jumped up at us. Billie
was as nervous as a colt and I was not far behind, although on this caper I was
just the “stooge”, if that. I’m the one who was to wait outside to see if John
Law came by. Once at my post I said- “Okay, Billie, good luck.”
And
strangely enough his luck was good that day, and many days after, although
those days after were not ring days (small grocery store robberies later turned
to armed robberies and jail terms the last I heard). That day though his haul
was five rings. Five shaky rings, shaky hands Billie, as we walked, then
started running, away from the downtown area. When we got close to home we
stopped near the beach where we lived to see up close what the rings looked
like. Billie yelled, “Damn.” And why did he yell that word. Well, apparently in
his terror (his word to me) at getting caught he just grabbed what was at hand.
And what was at hand were five women’s rings. At that moment he practically
cried out about how was he going to impress girls, ten, eleven or twelve- year
old girls, even if they were as naïve as
us, and maybe more so, that Elvis, the King, was your bosom buddy and you were
practically his only life-line adviser with five women’s rings? Damn, damn is
right.